Larry Cappel is a licensed psychotherapist and clinical counsellor in Denver, Colorado who specialises in working with gay men and the issues they struggle with. Larry is a certified teacher of mindfulness and meditation and has a passion for working with gay men and the issues that prevent them from living rich and rewarding lives.
Fear is a factor for everyone and when it comes to joining a group and even a gay men’s group then the fear may escalate often resulting in procrastination, avoidance and non-attendance. We have certainly seen this over the years when we run our annual gay men’s group.
If you didn’t catch the ‘It’s time’ video below at the end of 2011, you were probably in the minority of gay men. The video produced by Australian Marriage Equality went viral after its launch and now has over 5 million views on YouTube.
One of the topics that frequently comes up with my gay private practice clients is the issue of using Grindr to meet other gay men. I’m always interested in the wide range of reactions to this app and what men think and feel about it. Some of my clients have occasional fun using this app, while others get hooked on constantly being online and cruising for other men- often leading to lots of frustration and despair.
Gay mens’ group therapy is a powerful and effective way of changing negative patterns in your relationships and help you learn how to communicate and relate effectively to create deeper relationships with other gay men. As I prepare for our next Sydney gay men’s group therapy, one of the most common questions we get from gay men is how can group therapy help build better relationships?
In my counselling work with the gay community, I am staggered by how many gay men report they have dissatisfying relationships. It seems to be the norm that gay men feel lonely, isolated and disconnected from other gay men and the broader community in general. If they are part of the gay community, many of their relationships tend to be superficial, vacuous and consist of ‘fair-weather friends’.
Sydney Gay Counselling is soon starting our next gay men’s group therapy in Sydney. The group will be facilitated by myself, Clinton Power, and my colleague, Adam McLean. Group therapy is a powerful way to work on deepening your connections with other gay men in a safe and supportive environment.
Time and time again in my clinical practice, I am coming across clients who report gay relationship breakdown because of problems in communication related to social media and the web 2.0. Web 2.0 refers to the new era of the internet where we have moved from static websites that people visit to an interactive social web where people form online communities and share information and resources.
No relationships are easy, gay or straight! I am always amazed how people spend so much time, money and energy studying, training and applying themselves in their professions to become the best they can be. Yet, when it come to relationships, many people think they will just happen and take care of themselves without much investment of time or effort.
In my last post I wrote about developing a relationship vision, either with your partner or if you are single, developing a vision of the type of relationship you would like to create in the future. The benefits of this are that you can become clearer about what your personal goals are, and together you can form relationship goals that you create, revise, and renew within your partnership.